Where the Missing Things Are

Lately there has been a great deal of activity centred around searching in our world. E-man was searching yesterday for the perfect mix of inspirational tunes to share with his team to pump everybody up in the dressing room. Getting into 'the zone' is apparently very important to 10 year old boys. He spent a lot of time, searching, listening, playing songs for Dad to screen for inappropriate content. In the end he could have saved himself a lot of time by just playing his personal inspirational play-list. All the good beats are there already – all public performance approved except that one by Tiny Tempa song and a great Eminem one. Yes, bad Mom alert, my kids listen to music occasionally dotted with a curse word and low grade profanity, they are ok...how else are they going to know what vocabulary will get them perma-grounded?

Lula has been searching too. Friday evening our house almost came unravelled while she scoured for her misplaced work schedule that would not have been missing in actual fact, had her coat not also been missing. Relief was granted by a third look in the closet. I'm not entirely certain how her coat came to be hanging in the closet (life is one mystery after another) but that's where she found it, right where is should have been, and there was her schedule right in the pocket where she left it. I'm going to be honest here and say that I liked the mini meltdown she was having, it was much more pleasant than the one she had upon realizing that she was scheduled for 8am not 1pm like she thought.

Then there is my search. The hunt high and low for the nail clippers. This drives me crazy! They are never where I put them, never in 'their place', never in their 'other' place, or even in the maybe place. Eventually I stop looking and stop looking at my nails that need desperate trimming. I get on with life. Feed kids and animals, drive people around, wash dishes and work, write, put laundry away. Then I find them, the nail clippers, nestled in the cup on the dryer meant for pocket change, dislodged buttons and items I've saved my washer from.

Isn't it funny how that happens, we look for things so hard that we make the job difficult for ourselves or we miss things that are right in front of us. Gratitude today that the answers to life and nail clippers always seem to turn up when I stop looking.

Lessons from the First Day of School

Our family learned some very big lessons on the first day of school this year.

1. Awful people exist in this world
2. Good people exist in this world
3. Gratitude exists even in the depths of sorrow

I was nearing the end of my day at work, looking forward to getting home to the first day of school catch-up. I love all those papers to fill out and the stories from my kids about who is in their class and how the teachers are. The chatter on the very first day of school always fills a house with a buzz of excitement and pure joy.

Just past 3 o'clock my phone rang. Instantly upon hearing Michael's voice I knew our day had taken a sharp turn in an opposite emotional direction.

"The vet just called me... Clara has been hit by a car...she didn't make it."

My heart sank to my knees, as I thought about the big lovable, floppy ear basset hound, who just last month came to be part of our family.

The details were very vague. I understood that a neighbour was at the vet clinic, as was at least one of my girls, someone was picking E-man up from school and Clara was gone.

I shut down my work and raced out the door. That 15 minute drive to my kids felt like a million years! Pulling into the vet clinic my heart sank again, immediately, I recognized our neighbour Ed's truck and the car of my good friend Patti. Please tell me it wasn't one of them, I prayed, knowing that the only thing that could make this situation any more devastating was if one of my friends felt responsible.

Inside the clinic I was greeted by a visibly upset receptionist and an equally upset vet and technician who took me to my kids. They opened the door to a tiny room and there they all were. My three babies with tear stained cheeks, Patti with her mascara stained sweater, Ed and Colin clearly deflated. I hugged everyone, asked a few questions and sent the kids home with Patti. Ed stayed behind to catch me up, and hold me up while I dealt with the unpleasantness of saying goodbye and making arrangements with the clinic staff for Clara's burial.

I learned, that the dogs had managed to somehow escape the fenced yard,  thankfully Ed spotted them and let the girls knows. I knew that an army of adults and kids would not have been able to return those dogs home if they got out. They had only been with us a month and while we were working on obedience, when it came to some things they listened like teenagers.

I learned, that the person who hit Clara did not hesitate, did not stop, did not even look back...and my heart broke a little more. I learned that Ed picked Clara up and carried her back to his truck. I learned, that Colin helped Ed the last part of the way and comforted Clara in the back as they raced to the vet clinic down the street. I learned, that KJ accompanied Ed and Colin and Clara and that Lula went to get E-man from school. I learned, that Ed had to use colourful explicatives with a complete stranger at a four way stop and that KJ was touched by that gesture. I learned, that Shawnie took care of Cooper while Patti headed to the Vet clinic to take care of my family.

I learned, that thankfully, Clara did not suffer.

Around the table (when we finally got around to supper) Michael and I tried to focus the conversation around the first day of school. It was clear that most everyone's food was going to be cold rather than consumed and E-man excused himself time and again to blow his nose and wipe his eyes.

I asked KJ to start our gratefuls for the evening. "I am grateful that I didn't get lost on my first day of highschool today" she said.

E-man left the table again, this time sobbing.

Lula was furious with me. "We shouldn't be doing this today, it's too sad, there is nothing grateful about today"

I explained that this was the most important day to acknowledge some gratitude, that even on the very worst day of your life there exists reasons to be thankful.

E-man returned to the table.

Lula conceded and offered a grateful "The first day of grade 11 went pretty smoothly at school."

I offered my Gratitude "I am grateful that Dad didn't get hurt in his motorcycle fender-bender this afternoon." (yes other things also transpired that made the first day back to school one we'd rather forget) I really wanted to grateful for the vet clinic staff and our friends but I did not want to open the flood gates of emotion any further.

Clearly Michael didn't want to either, for his grateful was "I'm glad everyone's first day at school was okay."

E-man's turn came. He choked up terribly and for a minute I thought maybe Lula was right, this was a bad idea. Then came his gratitude....

"I am grateful that we have such good neighbours" he said.

And I learned.... That my son gets it. That even in the face of extreme sorrow he can choose to focus on the space between the raindrops.

The first day of school 2011 was filled with lessons...

1. Horrible people who would rundown a dog exist
2. There exists also wonderful souls like Ed, Colin, Patti, Shawnie, and the staff at Williamsburg Veterinary Hospital.
3. Gratitude exists in all circumstances

Our extreme gratitude to Ed, Colin, Patti, Shawnie, The Staff at Williamsburg Veterinary Hospital and to Lorraine and Sarah who blessed us with the company of Clara. I know this is heartbreaking for you as well and I am sorry.

Lessons from Joey

While taking in Canada Day festivities we came across this image from the travelling petting zoo...

I didn't ask the history behind this animal's current circumstance (I didn't want to inquire actually, traveling petting zoos horrify me already)

Clearly something had gone terribly ari in this poor joey's life to be living in an Areopostle tote bag.

We could learn a lot about a grateful attitude from this little guy. I know a lot of people who, if displaced from their ideal life, would be complaining because their bag wasn't Couture. I know a lot of people who would be hopping around the cage in protest of everything that wasn't right about receiving a pink bag hanging undignified from a chainlink frence. Fortunately I also know a lot of people like Joey, willing to enjoy the best life has to offer, make the best of a less than ideal situation and just hang out.

Enjoy your day...find some gratitude in those less than ideal cirrcumstances today...BE A JOEY!

Spend some moment everyday in reflection of gratitude and happiness. Even if the time found is standing in line for coffee...use is wisely.


Michelle


Did this post brighten your day? make you smile? If so I'd be ever so grateful if you shared it on Facebook or Twitter. Someone else might be in need of a smile - Thanks!

The Challenge for 100!

I'm throwing down a challenge for The Space Between Raindrops. The challenge is to raise the number of followers to 100!

Everyday, I receive e-mails and messages thanking The Space Between Raindrops for providing some perspective, a reminder to keep positive or a simple laugh.

I get these notes of gratitude and I think...I wish I could do this for everybody!

Ok, everybody is a tall order. I've decided to start with 100. I want to see if we can get the number of FOLLOWERS to 100!

But I am going to need your help...

1. If you haven't already, click the "FOLLOW" icon on the right side of the page  (its the one with the little pictures under it)

2. Tell your friends...Tweet it up, Share to Facebook, Email a link to everyone in your contacts list. Why not sent them your favorite post!

3. Watch the "FOLLOWERS" count grow!

If The Space Between Raindrops has ever brightened your day, made you laugh or helped you think about things from a different angle...help us share that feeling!

I have a theory that gratitude is just as infectious as misery...Thank you for helping me test the theory.

The Journey Begins With a Single Toothbrush

Our home is filled with oddity. We've talked before about each room being the equivalent of a "what's wrong with this picture" page. If you've missed our talks check out The Doctor's Waiting Room Has Nothing on Me you'll understand what I'm talking about.

I've reached a point where I am no longer shocked by oddity. Things being out of place really is the norm. 2 weeks ago KJ's graduation picture hung upside down on the wall for 3 days because that's how she put it in the frame. Last week I finally had E-man move his hockey bag from under the dinning room table (hockey season is over.) Very little, stops me in my tracks.

This did however...

I reached for my toothbrush only to find this message elasticised to the handle. "This is the Beginning of an Incredible Journey" Clearly I have become the victim of my own love of littering our home with words. One of my children is either fed up with the practice or really understands my passion.

My powers of motherly deduction led me to determine the culprit. KJ...cleaver, crafty and in charge of cleaning my (I mean 'our') bathroom this week. I was only slightly surprised to learn that the origin of the 'toothbrush label' was the garment tag from KJ's newly acquired bra. How on earth this sentiment relates to a brazier is beyond my comprehension. (ok, perhaps I can conjure up a scenario or two but none that would be remotely acceptable for my 13 year old daughter!)

Regardless of where the sentiment came from or how it came to be attached to my toothbrush, it does get me thinking... This really is the beginning of an incredible journey. Everyday is the opportunity to begin a new adventure. You get up, "shit, shower, shave" (as my dad is fond of saying) and you brush your teeth. You've got all the necessities out of the way. It's a question of what you are going to do after you brush, what choices will you guide your day with? What path will you take? How do you feel about the journey that lays ahead?

If it had been the receipt for the bra or the price tag attached to my toothbrush I would have sighed in exasperation, removed it, chucked it and moved for the toothpaste. I like the message on my toothbrush though, so I left it there. It gives me a chuckle 3 times a day at the clever humor of my youngest daughter. It also gives my a cause for reflection. Automatically now I'm not thinking about up..down..20 times left..20 times right. No, I'm thinking about the step I'm taking after I put that toothbrush away.

Gratitude today for KJ's little prank that was actually an act of wisdom beyond her years.


Spend some moment everyday in reflection of gratitude and happiness. Even if the time found is standing in line for coffee...use is wisely.


Michelle


Did this post brighten your day? make you smile? If so I'd be ever so grateful if you shared it on Facebook or Twitter. Someone else might be in need of a smile - Thanks!

Tomorrow's a Mystery

What's in the box? It's a mystery obviously, you can't see inside. The ominous question marks on the outside suggest that what is inside might not be entirely desirable. It's not a big box but then some great things come in very small packages. (think candy and spare change) Of course some equally crappy things would fit in such a small box (think lima beans or a credit card bill folded over and over again into a tiny square)

This box could hold anything. It used to hold candy. I've been staring at it for the better part of the morning because it has been refilled by one of my 'fun loving' nephews. I know there is something inside, even an empty box is full of nothing. The question is whether I'm going to be grateful for what's inside the box or not. 

I'm thinking about the week ahead and wondering what's in store. It's a mystery like what's inside the box. You can stare at it all you want but eventually you have to open the box. There might be crap in store or something great either way it demands attention ...the trick is going to be turning whatever it is into something to be grateful for.

Keeping The Space. Keeping The Faith

It's been quiet around here, hasn't it? You know what they say when the streets are empty..."there must be something going on at the playhouse." Ok, you've probably never heard that before. Some sayings are in my head, planted there by my Gran or a vision of what she would say in any given situation. I kind of like this one.

There have been no gratitude updates this week, no amateur snapshots of toilet paper rolls or kids camped in sheet forts. Posts that shine light on the fun side of everyday chaos are still locked inside my head, (if you need a grateful for today... go ahead use this if you like. I promise my feelings will not be hurt.) The blog has been neglected, abandoned, along with the laundry, in favour of handling family crisis. Actually one of us is in "crisis" the rest of us are in a state of emergency.

This morning I ran out of underwear. I should have thought while I was shuffling, updating, arranging, rearranging, scheduling and rescheduling, I should have thought to reassign laundry duty. I should have but I didn't and clean underwear is pretty important in my books. This morning I'm catching up. The washer is humming, I'm drinking coffee and checking in with my gratitude. I should have re-assigned someone to keep "The Space" updated. Keeping a grateful mindset is as emotionally significant to our family as clean boxers.

There have been great moments of gratitude this week... Michael's months of study concluded this week with his final exam on Saturday

Eman earned the last $10 he need to buy the Pokemon Black and White game. I understand that this is actually 2 separate games. He bought the Black, he'll need alot more snow to get the White version too. Lula has been spending time with friends and new shoes, KJ has been enjoying spontaneous pizza parties at school and new shoes.

I know there have been more gratefuls this week for my family. While I finish up the laundry this morning I'm going to hand over the laundry soap and the password and ask them to keep The Space Between Raindrops updated with our daily gratefuls. Now more than anytime before us this space is crucial.

As for my greatest Gratitude this week. It is the wee hours of Thursday morning that found me in the emergency department with my brother. He looked at me and said "Turn this into a Gratitude." He doesn't know it but I probably have never been more grateful than at that very moment. He also doesn't know yet but that exact moment will be the very one he will be most grateful for. For now, he works to get to that day, we work to support him and when he comes to me and wants to talk about those hours I think I'll lend him the password and ask him to share a Gratitude.

Until then there is only faith.


Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all.  Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.

The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours.     

Ayn RandRussian-born American Author

Take 5

We all have days where we need to "practice" gratitude. Challenging days and experiences plague us all. These are also the time we need to dig a little deeper and unearth some gratitude. Finding little things to be grateful for opens the door for more good to come in.

Here's a quick trick for those moments when we need to "take 5"

1...think of all the places you'll go today. Which one is your favourite. Maybe you are a mother of 3 and your favourite place to be is the solitude of your bathroom. It's okay to be grateful for locking doors and running water.

2 ...What's the song playing over and over again in your head right now? "Take this Job and Shove It" ? That's a good one!  I bet in your head your rehearsing the choreography too! You can be grateful for a sense of humour.

3 ...What 's the best thing you've eaten today? That first cup of coffee? A muffin, that was suppose to be carrot but turned out to be banana because that girl who served you screws it up every morning?

4 ... Quick! Count how many people said good morning or hello to you today. Who from that list were you happiest to see? I bet it wasn't the girl that serves your muffin but I bet she said good morning.

5 ...Go back over the list and think about what you could have answered. Right now the best place someone might be is with their child in a hospital room. Someone's song could be "Amazing Grace". Some people won't think about what they've eaten but rather if their children will eat tonight. Some people have lost the one person that makes them happiest to see.